Guest Blogger?

SO my dedicated readers! Since I posted the epic story, "The Hobble," the guru has become friends (just how good is still pending) with said hobble, Blainebo. Turns out, he's pretty awesome (pending further approval). AH, connections! Drunk ass connections! I've actually been keeping in touch with him as well.

The guru went ahead and sent him the posting for "The Hobble" and he luuuurved it. He lurved it so much that he was all jazzed up about creating some posts for this here blog. I am all about people sharing their stories with me so I can get some new insights and points-of-view on the blog, because let's face it, I can't be out on dates ALL THE TIME. I mean, I could but I just choose not to. OH yeah! Up top! Nice.

So, Blainebo emails me on a Saturday night and asks if he can contribute a guest entry, and I write back, "of course! send it along and I'll post it up for you!" Below is what he sent me. I literally cut and paste this from my email to your eyes.

"It's called 'Pick-up Spots'

Location; sagamore hotel, miami
Time; 7:28pm
Scene. Wow. Lady gaga would be embarassed here. What do parents do to their kids to make them want to dress like this?"

That's it? That's what you wanted to post? Blainebo! You are going to have to try a bit harder than that! Let me point out what strikes me as unusual.

1. Miami? He knows the title of my blog is "Adventures in New York Dating" right? I mean, I'm all about so-called "Pick-up Spots," but in my neighborhood pick-up spots would be preferable. I'm not going to travel to Miami to find a dude. I'm not that desperate. Maybe sometimes I am. NO NO I'm definitely not! ...maybe.

2. 7:28pm? That's a little early to be trying to pick up a hottie on a Saturday night. That's M-F happy hour pick-up time. I think most of the people you are going to pick up are going to be either of AARP age or "regulars." And by regulars, I mean they are already going to be vomit-wasted by this time and they do this every day.

3. I don't even know how to begin to tackle this last one. The only place Lady Gaga would ever be embarrassed would be at a rodeo. Wait, no. She'd probably be ok with that. Maybe a retirement home? A J. Crew photo shoot? At a WASPy dinner party? I can't think of anything...

"What do parents do to their kids to make them want to dress like this?" Ok, verge of funny right now, but what are they wearing!? And why are their kids at a bar? Am I misinterpreting? Help! Help!

OH man. It was a good attempt, but A LITTLE more effort needs to be involved, amiright?

Blainebo emailed me on Monday, "No recollection of this email chain. Ha ha." So, I'm giving him a break on this one! Too much Miami heat and Lady Gaga wanna-be's.

Miami? Really?