Passive Aggressive Dating

Spring has finally sprung! It's a gorgeous 70 degree evening in New York City tonight. The sun is shining and the air is warm. You ask, why are inside on such a lovely day? To which I respond, screw you, mind your own business. NO! I say, this is the first evening that I could go home right after work - and work is cra-zay at the moment - and I'm trying to write whenever I can. Even on warm sunny days. It's all for you!

My bff recently sent me a new handy dandy dating-type website thingy called "Subway Crush". It is very similar to the "Missed Connections" section of Craigslist, except it is set up by subway, giving the subway line in the appropriate colored bubble () and the headline matches the color. People write in stuff like "Cutie in floppy hat. Our hands touched." BARF. The site hasn't been populated as much as Missed Connections, and it's not nearly as raunchy. (Seriously, if you have never perused the Missed Connections, you are missing out! People write the craziest stuff. Do it next time you are bored). Oh, but I did just see the headline on Subway Crush, "Tall Drink of Water - Huge Package." Nice! That's what I like to see.

Let's face it, we spend a lot of time on the subway just as a by-product of living in NYC. I know that I see plenty of cuties every time I am on the subway, but how do you actually go about talking to someone? You write them a message after the fact, instead of just putting yourself out there and risking perhaps a little rejection. The internet! Allowing people to maintain social awkwardness since 1996 - that's the year my parents got AOL on our home computer. Yeah dial-up! I'll also admit that it can be supremely awkward to just start talking to someone on the subway, especially in rush hour prior to a morning cup of joe with about 50+ other passengers on the same train.

Even with my faithful Crazy Blind Date site, a few of the guys who I have gone out with have been very passive aggressive when asking me for a second date. Following the date, you can just have the site send your information to the person, so they can contact you. No reason to get someone's number that night, unless you really want to go out with them. Two guys got my number immediately following the date, and the one guy asked me out again that night. Total turn off, mostly because he asked me out via text message to which I turned him down via text message. But that's old news!

The last guy I went out with (who had a goatee, and you all know how I feel about goatees!) didn't even mention going out again, then that night, he sent me his information asking me if I wanted to hang out another time. It caught me off guard, because I just didn't think he was interested or that he picked up the fact that I was totally not interested.

If any of you faithful readers out there will remember the original goateed man, you should know that he got my number as we were saying our goodbyes. I genuinely wanted to go out with him again, because he was smart, funny, and seemed pretty cool. Maybe the physical attraction wasn't there, but hey you never know! I've got a keep an open mind with this whole dating thing. Like I've said before, positivity! Well, the goateed man sent me his info the next day and wrote me a really nice message, so I wrote him back and it all seemed fine. Until I got an email from him a few days later, which read:

"You had mentioned that you would be interested in meeting up again. If this is still the case, let me know when you might be free. I'm around tonight and tomorrow and maybe Saturday evening if you are interested in doing something again."

Uh, are you asking me out? Because that is the LAMEST way anyone has ever asked me out! Our previous emails were super casual, but this one sounded like he was writing to a business associate. Also, he was giving me a time table to respond (the email was written on a Wednesday afternoon). Um, ok! I'm a busy lady. I may not be able to make plans with you on a whim (even though that is the entire point of CBD, shhh). I felt like I was being scolded or something; like I should have been the one to write him about going out another time after exchanging a total of two emails. I'm sorry, but that is not the way to a girl's heart, especially mine! Take some initiative dude! I would have probably gone out with him, if he didn't send me the most passive aggressively lame email known to wo-man.

Ah, this is the city that we live in. People can easily hide behind the guise of their online selves instead of taking chances and talking to other human beings (one world, y'all). Though, I will say, it is taking a big risk to go out on a date with someone who you have no prior knowledge about. You wouldn't think that the people using such a service would be so lame! And afraid of confrontation, as I write from the comfort of my living room, typing as my online self, watching my roommate's cat chase her tail. Listen, people, I never said I was perfect!

Hopefully with the warmer weather moving in, the city will get a little happier and we will all remember that just because we are New Yorkers, doesn't mean we are too cool for school. Because that statement right there was a testament to how lame I am.

Maybe I was too harsh on the goateed man.

Naw.

PS. I learned how to set up links in my blog, which I'm sure you noticed. I totally went on overkill tonight.